News

Building the Foundations for Student Learning

Thu, 24 Sep 2026 04:00:00 +0000

During our in-service professional learning day in August, we reflected on six years of curriculum development since launching our summer grant program in 2021. What began that year as a group of only eight teachers has grown into a cohort of twenty-four summer grant participants, all working to strengthen and elevate our academic program.

Good curriculum design, like solid architecture, requires significant work, much of which may go unseen. The planning and collaboration teachers engage in ahead of time and alongside their daily teaching are like the foundational supports of a bridge built over water: the work begins beneath the surface, before the finished structure is visible, and long before students cross. Our teachers lay these foundations early so that students can benefit from stronger, more intentional learning experiences throughout their academic lives.

Below, you will find a brief timeline of just a few of those foundational pillars developed over the past six years (with many other impactful initiatives not listed here!).

Timeline of curriculum improvement through summer grants

2021 - Foundational Work: Launched the summer grant program to provide dedicated time, funding, and resources for teacher-led innovation. Inaugural projects established our Portrait of a Graduate, improved our learning support strategies in lower school, and integrated SEL-aligned literature into lower school libraries.
2023-2024 - Common Framework: Built dedicated, protected collaboration time directly into the school calendar to support regular cross-grade and cross-divisional work, and formally adopted Understanding by Design (UbD) to establish a shared language and framework for backward curriculum planning.
2024-Present - Program Improvement: Grounded in a shared framework and cross-grade alignment, faculty implemented improvements in phonics and reading, math, health, the arts, responsive classroom approaches, scheduling, field trips, and Joy Term (to name just a few!).
2025-Present - Deep-Dive Review Cycles: Expanded our approach to deliberate, deep-dive reviews of our learning progression. Examining two core disciplines annually, Design Teams reviewed Math and Writing last year, are assessing Spanish and Social Studies this year, and will turn to STEM and ELA in 2027-2028.

The work our teachers undertake through these summer experiences directly impacts our students’ experiences in the classroom. We are grateful for all that our teachers do, and want to especially thank those faculty members who took time out of their summer to help build the bridge that is our academic program here at Prep. We are proud of our faculty of learners and leaders who embrace new challenges, contribute to the broader work of strengthening our programs across grade levels, and continually learn from one another. In doing so, they model for our students what it means to be a lifelong learner and ensure that the bridge we are building together is strong enough to carry them forward.

The impact of this work can be seen in the breadth of this summer’s projects and professional development experiences.

2026 Summer Grant Projects

Professional Development

iTheatrics Annual Musical Theater Professional Development
SAIS Institute for New Teachers
International Society for Technology in Education (ISTE) Annual Conference
NAMC Infant/Toddler Montessori Diploma Program
IMSE Orton-Gillingham Plus Course

Curricular Improvement

Social Studies Curricular Review Design Team (participants from all three divisions)
Spanish Curricular Review Design Team (all Spanish teachers)
Lower School Immersive Art Exhibition Development
4th Grade Collaborative Classroom Being a Reader & Hands-On Math Enhancement
K-2 Phonics & Sight Word Scope and Sequence
PK-4 Spanish Cuaderno de Español
3rd Grade Hands-On Math Curriculum Enhancement
Kindergarten Hands-On Math Curriculum Enhancement
Middle School Makeup Work System
The Bulb Community Service Project

Get to Know Katie Keels

Thu, 17 Sep 2026 04:00:00 +0000

Joining Charlotte Prep as director of philanthropy this year, Katie Keels brings 14 years of advancement experience, 11 of which were spent at a K-8 school. With deep roots in Charlotte independent education and a passion for connecting families to our mission, she is already making a wonderful impact across our campus. Read on to discover what inspires her approach to philanthropy and her vision for nurturing a joyful, community-centered culture of giving!

What inspired you to make Charlotte Prep your new home?

From the moment I stepped onto campus, I knew this school was special! There is a joy that radiates through the halls from both students and faculty, and I couldn’t wait to be part of it. I’ve always been drawn to communities that feel welcoming and connected, and I felt that right away at Charlotte Prep.

Was there a moment in your life when you realized you wanted to spend your career in philanthropy?

I’ve always been a volunteer at heart—the person who joins the committee, organizes the bake sale, or leads the phone-a-thon. Acts of service is my love language! Once I became a mom, I really felt called to make a career change to a profession where I could combine that love of service with my desire to make a difference in the lives of others. I’ve been lucky enough to find a career that allows me to do both every day.

What energizes you most about this work?

The people! I love getting to know families and hearing what they love about Charlotte Prep and their hopes for the future of the school. I also love connecting the dots between a family’s generosity and the impact it has on students and teachers. There’s something pretty special about helping someone see that their gift (at any level!) makes a lasting difference.

What do you hope to achieve for Charlotte Prep?

I want to build a culture where philanthropy feels like a natural and joyful part of being a Charlotte Prep family. I’d love for families to understand not just that we need their support, but why it matters and exactly what their generosity makes possible. Ultimately, I hope to build strong, lasting relationships with our families and create a community of people who feel deeply connected to the school and excited to invest in its future.

What do you like to do for fun?

On the weekends, you can find me catching a concert, playing mahjong, or cheering (loudly!) for my hometown Philadelphia Phillies!

A Campus Culture Where Everyone Matters

Thu, 03 Sep 2026 04:00:00 +0000

Last week, a parent told me that her child begs to come to school and doesn’t want to leave at the end of the day, something she never felt as a kid. That conversation offered a great image for what I want our theme to be this school year: Mattering.

This summer our admin team read a book called Mattering: The Secret to Building a Life of Deep Connection and Purpose by Jennifer Breheny Wallace. Wallace defines mattering as the core human need to feel valued and to have the opportunity to add value.

I see this spirit in action across our halls daily, from a first grader telling a classmate he is proud of him to Chef David delivering a meal to a teacher grieving the loss of her dog.

This emphasis on connection directly complements our high academic standards and commitment to continuously improving our curriculum. We empower our teachers with modern pedagogy tools, professional development, instructional coaching, and classroom observation, which are all especially vital in the age of artificial intelligence.

And those efforts pay off. In a survey of alumni parents whose students started high school last year, over 90% said their Prep grad was either very well or extremely well prepared for ninth grade.

Our faculty continues to lead beyond our campus, too. Bethany Orr, our new fifth and sixth-grade math teacher, is presenting "Recipe for Rigor" at the NC Council of Teachers of Mathematics annual conference, sharing instructional strategies that elevate student thinking, modeling, reasoning, and discourse.

And as we plan for the future, Julia Walthall-Eisman, our new head of strategic programs, is leading key initiatives in high school placement, PreK-8 STEM/Innovation, and artificial intelligence.

You can learn more about our approach to AI at our upcoming parent information session on the morning of Friday, October 2, or join our Innovation Focus Group on the evening of Thursday, October 22. More details to come!

As we begin a very exciting new school year, I want you to know that each person in this community matters to me, and as your children tell you about their experiences at school, I invite you to send a quick note to a teacher who has made an impact to let them know they matter.

What's on Our Summer Reading List

Thu, 04 Jun 2026 04:00:00 +0000

The upcoming break provides a great opportunity for our faculty and staff to dive into reading they may not have had time for during the school year. While their summer reading lists will surely include a few fun beach picks, many are also exploring titles that will inspire their work in the year ahead, whether through books on pedagogy, young adult novels, or picture books they may bring into their classrooms. Here’s what our faculty and staff are adding to their summer stacks.

Todd Ballaban:

Our Senior Admin Team will be reading the book Mattering by Jennifer Wallace, which examines how humans can find value and meaning through connection with others and by contributing to their communities. The book analyzes the psychological and social aspects of feeling important, creating meaning, and deepening relationships as vital components to a meaningful life. These themes blend seamlessly with our school’s commitment to belonging and inclusivity and our cultural norm of forming deep connections with our students.

Jasmine Bethel:

Mrs. Bethel plans to read novels for her personal enjoyment, including The Things We Never Say by Elizabeth Strout and Where the Wildflowers Grow by Terah Shelton Harris. For something focused on child development, she is reading Jonathan Haidt’s popular book about children growing up in a digital world, The Anxious Generation.

Katherine Buhler:

Two school-related books I plan to dig into this summer are Glen Whitman's Neuroteach and Modifying Your Thinking Classroom for Any Setting by Peter Liljedahl, which is a follow-up to our Math team's common read last summer (Building Thinking Classrooms in Mathematics). For a fun young adult read, I'm looking forward to The Hero Next Door, a short story compilation featuring acclaimed authors such as William Alexander, Linda Sue Park, and R.J. Palacio. I hope to pull a story or two to use in 7th-Grade Life Skills class next year.

Kato Nims:

In recent years, I have become increasingly interested in learning about how to design curriculum and learning experiences that meet the needs of all learners. This summer, I will be reading about neurodivergent learners to help grow my understanding and teaching skills. Neurodiversity-Affirming Schools: Transforming Practices So All Students Feel Accepted and Supported is the book I've selected which promises to be both informative and practical in application. Additionally, I will be exploring my favorite picture book resource list, Social Justice Books, to find recommended picture books to read that highlight neurodiverse characters and experiences.

Allison Pera:

Summer is the ideal time to encourage curiosity, find joy, and reset our family rhythm. For my summer reading, I look forward to pairing the imaginative magic of the picture book The Wonder by Tom Percival with the practical wisdom of the parenting book Outdoor Kids in an Inside World by Steven Rinella. The Wonder reminds us that we can find joy in both grand adventures and long, boring car rides. Oudoor Kids in an Inside World suggests a shift in our perspective and surroundings to focus on our children’s physical and mental health. While values like kindness, curiosity, courage, and stewardship are timeless, using nature as a primary classroom offers a unique way to grow. It is a simple yet powerful commitment to trade modern distractions for the lasting lessons found in the great outdoors.

Ashley Shaefer:

A common refrain in my 7th and 8th grade classrooms, when my students approach summer reading, is, “Ugh, I hate reading!” Acknowledging that individual reading tastes are as unique as my students are, there is evidence from both recent educational scholarship and personal anecdotes collected over years of teaching that one reason students express disinterest in reading is that they are actually reading books that are too easy for them, and don’t offer them the reward that comes with inference-making or encountering thought-provoking characters and ideas. With this in mind, my summer reading will include several selections from the 2026 Alex Awards list: awards given annually to works of fiction with high literary value that are technically for adult audiences, but have special appeal to young adults. I’m starting with What Kind of Paradise by Janelle Brown, checking out new graphic novel called Insectopolis by Peter Kuper, and venturing into the realm of science fiction with Hole in the Sky by Daniel Wilson.

Jessica Sarnicola:

Parenting From the Inside Out by Daniel Siegel and Mary Hartzell. This book stands out from the crowd of parenting books because it really requires the reader to engage in deep personal and relational reflection. Authors guide the reader in examining how our own early childhood experiences shape who we become as parents while also reminding us that we have agency to recognize and adjust patterns that don’t align with the parent we would want to be for our own children. Reflective questions and exercises throughout the book provoke the reader to think deeply and foster meaningful change.

Jessica Stargell:

This summer, I’m diving into two books that tackle the core of the middle school experience: intellectual agency and social confidence. First, I’ll be reading Make Just One Change: Teach Students to Ask Their Own Questions by Dan Rothstein and Luz Santana. I’m excited to explore the Question Formulation Technique (QFT), a simple yet powerful framework that shifts students from passive recipients of information to active drivers of their own inquiry—a vital skill for the independent learners we strive to cultivate. Also, I’ll be perusing A Teen’s Workbook for Conquering Social Anxiety. Middle school is a pivotal time for navigating social dynamics, and my goal is to integrate these practical strategies for building self-esteem and managing fear directly into our Leadership class curriculum this coming year.

Megan Wright:

The summer is a great time for me to explore chapter books that would appeal to our Lower School students, either as read-alouds or independent book options. With May having been Asian American and Pacific Islander Heritage Month, I was naturally pulled toward books highlighting this perspective. I will be reading Karina Yan Glaser's The Nine Moons of Han Yu and Luli, a dual-timeline story set in 731 China and 1931 New York City, following children working to save their families' businesses. I will also dive into A Wish in the Dark by Christina Soontornvat, a fantasy story that explores oppression, justice, and the nuances of right and wrong. I am looking forward to leisurely visits to libraries and bookstores on the hunt for new and engaging picture books!

Class of 2026 High School Destinations

Tue, 19 May 2026 04:00:00 +0000

We are so proud of our Charlotte Preparatory School graduating class of 2026! These students have shown themselves time and time again as exceptional scholars, athletes, and artists. But more importantly, they model the values of our core pillars, and that is the lifelong mark of a Prep graduate that they will carry with them.

Each of our graduates is heading to an excellent high school that is best suited to their interests and talents, and we are very excited to see what they accomplish there and beyond!

This year, 97% of our graduating 8th graders were accepted into one or both of their top two choices for high school, and 15 students were accepted to every school they applied to!

We are also excited to see where our graduates from the class of 2022 matriculate for college! We are tracking those destinations here.

High School Destinations

Rose B.
Charlotte Christian School

Olivia B.
South Meck High School

Wesley B.
Charlotte Latin School

Ethan B.
Myers Park High School

Mila B.
Myers Park High School

Ayaan B.
Providence Day School

Jonah B.
Charlotte Latin School

Jack C.
Providence High School

Arvind D.
Providence Day School

Sophie D.
Charlotte Country Day School

Ben E.
Myers Park High School

Sabrina S.
Providence Day School

Annie J.
Charlotte Latin School

Kinzie K.
East Mecklenburg High School

Lucien L.
Charlotte Country Day School

Lael L.
Charlotte Latin School

Elle M.
Charlotte Catholic High School

Eloise M.
Charlotte Country Day School

Amos M.
Myers Park High School

Oliver M.
Charlotte Catholic High School

Olivia M.
Charlotte Catholic High School

Miraya P.
Providence Day School

Trey P.
Charlotte Latin School

Elyah P.
Charlotte Country Day School

Eva P.
Charlotte Latin School

Jonah R.
Myers Park High School

Lauren R.
Walnut Hill School for the Arts

Lincoln R.
Marvin Ridge High School

Alexandra R.
Charlotte Country Day School

Nicholas S.
Charlotte Latin School

Jillian S.
Myers Park High School

Hudson S.
Charlotte Latin School

Benjamin S.
Charlotte Latin School

Jonah S.
York Prep Academy

Brandon T.
Providence Day School

Lennon T.
Providence High School

Lauren V.
Charlotte Latin School

Gregory W.
Charlotte Latin School

Luke W.
Carolina Day School

Prep 8th Grader Accepted to Walnut Hill School for the Arts

Wed, 13 May 2026 04:00:00 +0000

It is the season of celebrations at Charlotte Prep, and the incredible journey of 8th grader Lauren R. is certainly worth celebrating. Lauren recently received news of her acceptance into the prestigious and highly competitive Walnut Hill School for the Arts for musical theater!

Charlotte Prep students are empowered to write their own stories and, after 8th grade, graduate to their best-fit high school. For some, that means finding an intensive environment that matches their specific passions.

We sat down with Lauren and her parents to discuss the audition process, the decision to pursue boarding school, and how her time at Prep laid the foundation for this exciting leap.

When did you first realize that musical theater was more than just an extracurricular activity for you?

The moment I knew that theater wasn’t just a hobby, but a passion, was when I stepped on stage for the first time as the queen in Charlotte Prep’s production of Once Upon a Mattress. I realized that if I could change even one person’s life by doing something I love, it would be enough. Since then, I have tried to share the gift I was lucky enough to find.

When did you know that Walnut Hill was the right high school for you?

I was very nervous during my first visit, but the second I got into the room, I felt safe, like this was a place where they truly wanted me to succeed. That feeling reminded me of my experience at Prep, and that made Walnut Hill feel like my home away from home.

What was the audition process like?

I was nervous because my family and I had worked so hard for this. I was the last to audition, but my nerves eased when they led me into the black box, because I always feel so at home in a theater. I sang "Not A Day Goes By" from Merrily We Roll Along, took a few notes from the director, and sang it again. By this point, the difficult part was over. I felt a strong connection with these people who were practically strangers because performing truly connects me with people.

What are you most excited about attending Walnut Hill?

I am so excited to stretch myself as an individual in a community of artists. I want to challenge myself and find my limits while learning more every day about the passion I've pursued for the past five years. Most importantly, I want to one day pass along everything I learn to the next generation.

How do you feel about the idea of living on campus?

I think it will be a huge adjustment, but an important life skill. It will teach me how to live on my own, do laundry, and clean dishes—but it also gives me the chance to learn to appreciate my schoolmates’ different perspectives. This school has students from all over the world, and the fact that I will be able to learn about their different cultures and opinions fascinates me.

How do you think your time at Prep helped prepare you for this?

The word “prepare” in Charlotte Preparatory School is an understatement. Prep has taught me so much about myself and the world. I have learned how to be independent but also part of a community, how to take risks, and how to be true to myself. I am so honored to be able to call myself a Prep alumna in less than a month.

Her Parents’ Perspective

For Lauren’s parents, the realization that boarding school was the right fit happened during a panel discussion at Prep’s boarding school fair last fall. As the speakers described the traits of a successful boarding student, every descriptor sounded exactly like Lauren. When Lauren turned to them with a knowing glance, they knew this was the right choice for their family.

They were excited by the opportunity to offer Lauren a different high school experience that matched her focused passions. Having watched her grow into an organized and responsible student during her middle school years at Prep, they felt confident she was ready to get the most out of an immersive environment—whether that be through Harkness classes at Phillips Exeter or equine training at an all-girls school like Foxcroft.

To other parents whose children have niche passions, they offer this encouragement:

"Boarding school can be an adventure for the passionate student who is ready for the challenge. It provides the opportunity to surround themselves with other focused, committed students. Iron sharpens iron. Don’t be intimidated by the higher tuition, as many schools have a commitment to accessibility and the resources to help families find an affordable option."

Congratulations, Lauren! We can't wait to see your name in lights.

Learn More About High School Placement

8th-Grade Ignite Presentations

Thu, 30 Apr 2026 04:00:00 +0000

Have you ever sat through a presentation that felt like it lasted a century? The Ignite movement seeks to end boring presentations forever, and in Charlotte Prep’s leadership class, 8th graders are learning to craft Ignite-inspired presentations of their own.

Started in Seattle in 2006, the Ignite movement has a simple mission: "Everyone speaks." It was developed to prove that public speaking can be high-energy, community-oriented, and—most importantly—not boring!

In a standard Ignite talk (the kind given by professionals and college students), the rules are strict: 20 slides, 15 seconds per slide, for a total of five minutes. The slides advance automatically, forcing the speaker to keep up with their own presentation.

To set our students up for success, I have adapted the format into what we call the Prep 5x30: five slides displayed for 30 seconds each. By giving students 30 seconds per slide, we provide a "Goldilocks" approach—fast enough to keep the energy high, but long enough for a student to recover if they lose their place.

It All Starts with Passion

Instead of a standard research project, students are given full creative control. They chose topics they are genuinely passionate about or something they’ve always wanted to know more about. This year, student presentations ranged from how to invest in the stock market to how to make lasting memories, from lucid dreams to black holes. By starting with a subject they love, the focus shifts from "remembering facts" to "sharing," which gets to the heart of effective communication.

Before any slides are created, students spend hours focusing deeply on their chosen topics. This isn't just "googling facts"; it is about becoming experts in something they are passionate about. This way, they develop a level of comfort that goes far beyond a script.

One of the most important lessons we emphasize is that these presentations are not meant to be memorized. Memorization often leads to a "robotic" delivery and the stress of remembering every word. Instead, we aim for a conversational style.

I consistently remind the students that only they will know if they forgot something. And because they become so familiar with their information, they are encouraged to simply "talk" to their audience. If the slide changes and they aren’t finished, they are empowered to pivot and keep the conversation moving, developing resilience and "on-your-feet" thinking.

Public speaking is one of the most vital skills for a leader. By mastering the Ignite format, our 8th graders are learning how to be concise, engaging, and brave. They aren't just giving a presentation; they are finding their unique voices.

Check Out Photos of this Year's Presentations

Learn More About Middle School at Prep

Hot off the Press: First-Grade News

Thu, 16 Apr 2026 04:00:00 +0000

In January, first graders in Mrs. Gilmartin’s and Mr. Stedman’s classes kicked off their annual newspaper project. With the newsrooms now up and running, their monthly editions will be written, printed, and delivered across campus through May.

Students learn that producing a monthly paper requires teamwork, and they share the workload by rotating through different jobs. The class votes on a campus staff member to feature, and one team of students interviews them. Another group takes on the role of researchers, diving into non-fiction topics. Finally, a dedicated delivery crew ensures the finished product reaches its readers. Because the roles rotate with every issue, every child gets a chance to interview, write, and distribute the paper before the end of the year.

Mrs. Gilmartin has organized this project for many years at the schools she’s taught, and the core lessons hold true. When students see their hard work published and printed, they learn that their effort serves a purpose and that their voices matter.

Our first-grade newspapers are child-directed, but the reach extends beyond their classrooms. The delivery crew hands out copies to teachers, administrators, and staff members across the school. The first graders especially love sharing their work with older students, who are always excited to receive the latest issue.

These young journalists have their own favorite parts of the process. Levi is looking forward to his upcoming turn on the delivery crew and has actively been asking classmates who have already delivered the paper for their best tips.

Another student perfectly summarized what makes the newspaper project a treasured memory: “It's fun to interview and write about a person, then get to deliver the paper to them! We get to see the middle school students and the different school offices on our route.”

Testing at Charlotte Prep

Thu, 09 Apr 2026 04:00:00 +0000

When people hear “standardized testing,” a certain image may come to mind. A large, vacuous gym with dozens of long tables set up. Pencils tapping on tables, TI-83 calculators in hand, and a couple hundred students sweating over a test that feels incredibly high stakes.

But testing at Charlotte Prep looks very different...

In our classrooms, we do not “teach to the test” or hang the threat of end-of-grade exams over students’ heads as motivation to participate in learning. Engagement and participation are driven by relationships, meaningful learning experiences, and students’ interests, strengths, and curiosity.

Understanding is assessed continuously through informal checks and a variety of measures. Our small classes allow teachers to truly know their students and understand where they are academically.

Standardized testing has its place, however. As part of our strategic plan, we’ve been evaluating how we use testing and gather data to better measure student progress and assess our curriculum.

Below, we hope to clarify what standardized testing is, what it is not, and how we use it to support both students and families.

Testing at Prep

Grade	Test	Provider
Grades 3-6	CTP-5 (Comprehensive Testing Program, Fifth Edition)	ERB (Education Records Bureau)
Grade 7	Independent School Entrance Exam (ISEE) For Practice	ERB (Education Records Bureau)
Grade 8	Independent School Entrance Exam (ISEE) For High School Placement	ERB (Education Records Bureau)
Grade 8	National Spanish Exam	ATSP (American Association of Teachers of Spanish and Portuguese)
Grade 8	CTP-5 Algebra Sub-Test (For students in Geometry or Algebra only)	ERB (Education Records Bureau)
Grade 8	Core Class Final Exams	Charlotte Preparatory School

What Standardized Testing Is at Charlotte Prep

A snapshot – not the full picture

We see these metrics as one snapshot of student learning—not the full picture. We believe in teaching the whole child, so classroom performance, projects, discussions, and teacher observations all remain essential parts of understanding a child’s learning and serve as the foundation of our academic program.

A tool for reflection and growth

For schools, these assessments offer valuable data. Because we use outside testing organizations, they provide an external perspective on how our students perform collectively and how our curriculum is serving them. Over time, this helps us refine our program, celebrate strengths, and identify areas for growth.

Preparation for future test-taking

Like it or not, standardized testing is a part of our education system, and our students will continue to encounter these tests throughout their academic careers. Exposure to this style of online, multiple-choice test format in a low-stakes environment will better prepare them for taking them in high school and beyond, when they might carry more weight.

What Standardized Testing Is Not at Charlotte Prep

Not the sole indicator of learning

Standardized tests are just one of many tools we use. Teachers rely far more on daily assessments, classwork, and interactions to understand how students are learning and where they need support.

Not a driver of our teaching

Instead of teaching to the test, we focus on building deep understanding, critical thinking, and problem-solving skills. When those are in place, students can transfer their learning to a variety of contexts, including standardized testing.

Not a perfect system

It’s important to acknowledge that standardized tests have limitations. Factors like test anxiety, differences in formats (even with preparation), or even a bad day can affect performance. That’s why we interpret results carefully and always in context.

How to Prepare

We use standardized testing primarily as an internal tool to support our students. It provides one data point to help inform families, guide instruction, and evaluate our curriculum. Over time, we look for trends that help us refine our academic program. At Charlotte Prep, testing is not high stakes – nothing like that sterile gym you might remember. There’s no cause for sweat!

Look out for reminders from teachers and through school communications. For 3rd-6th-grade CTP ERB testing, students need to bring a charged computer and a book each day.
Take care of basic needs! Students will benefit from a good night’s sleep, a hearty breakfast, and a healthy snack on test days.
Keep the experience in perspective. Remind your child this is just one snapshot of their skills—not a measure of their overall progress or understanding. Encourage them to see it as a challenge rather than something to fear, and help them understand that the experience itself can be a valuable opportunity to learn.

Cultivating Your Child’s Inner Voice

Fri, 13 Mar 2026 04:00:00 +0000

The Power of Parents’ Words

As parents, we are the primary architects of our children’s internal landscapes. While we do not create their inner dialogue entirely, we are the most significant contributors to how they speak to themselves. And while children may forget our exact words, they vividly remember the feelings those words evoke. Even when a child seems unaffected on the surface, our language is shaping their perception and memory in ways that can be helpful or harmful for years to come.

Before reacting, it is helpful to identify your own triggers. Are you responding out of fatigue, fear, or simple familiarity with a negative pattern? Ask yourself:

Am I correcting or criticizing?
Am I teaching or shaming?
Would I say this to a friend?

When making a correction, we should speak to behavior and not identity. Labeling a child creates identity statements that tend to stick. Instead, naming a specific emotion or behavior—such as saying, “the way you spoke to that adult was not respectful”—allows the child to see the situation as temporary and changeable rather than a fixed character flaw.

To help your child through challenges, consider replacing criticism with growth-oriented language:

Instead of focusing on failure, try: “You’re still learning. What could be different next time?”
When boundaries are crossed: “That choice wasn’t okay.”
When they are overwhelmed: “You’re upset. I’m here if you want me to help you calm down.”

If you catch yourself mid-sentence using hurtful words, be willing to stop and "reverse course" immediately. It is perfectly okay to say, “That’s not right. I want to start that again”.

The Art of the Repair

We all have those regrettable moments when we hurt our children’s feelings. However, repair is not about erasing the mistake; it is an intentional opportunity to adjust your words and reshape their experience.

Effective repair involves four key steps:

Acknowledgment: Do not wait and hope the moment is forgotten.
Impact: Ask how they were affected by what you said.
Adjustment: Talk about what you would do differently next time.
Reconnection: Forgive yourself and reconnect over something positive.

Find Moments for Meaningful Pride

Even when expressing pride, intentionality matters. Keep your praise proportional to the achievement and check in with how the child feels about their own success. Sometimes, a simple sticky note can be more impactful than a spoken word. Most importantly, show pride when they encounter and navigate obstacles, not just when they achieve a positive outcome.

The power of our words does not end the moment they are spoken. We always have the opportunity to shape the experience that follows and, in doing so, help our children build a resilient and kind inner voice.