Stories

Character is destiny. So said the Greek philosopher Heraclitus 2500 years ago. This is one reason why an important part of a child’s education is character formation, and one essential quality of good character is to be ethical. It seems simple enough – do the right thing. But we only need to dip into whatever media landscape we frequent to know that stories of unethical human behavior are common. Perhaps being good and ethical is not so simple after all.

I believe people choose to be unethical because they think it will somehow benefit them. But unethical behavior almost always leads to psychological or emotional distress and ruin; it is an inherently selfish and self-destructive act.

In his book Ethics for the New Millennium, the Dalai Lama notes the power of ethical behavior and argues that ethical living brings peace of mind and happiness. Being good is good for everyone – for the recipients of the good behavior and the person acting ethically.

I believe children understand this concept to their core. When children behave unethically, they know it. This knowledge may spring more from a distressing feeling, especially in younger children, than from rational understanding. But children of all ages, be they two or fourteen, are acutely attuned to issues of right and wrong and the importance of ethical behavior.

The Dalai Lama’s reminder that ethical behavior yields peace of mind and happiness is a good lesson to share with children and one they will quickly understand and internalize. Good behavior then becomes a noble habit that feeds a virtuous loop – doing good feels good, leading to more ethical behavior and increased self-worth and internal peace. And when we view the state of the world today and the many examples of unethical adult behavior within it, this investment in ethical development may very well turn out to be one of the most important things we do as parents and educators.